


I'll be your match, your light, your burning sun

by thetimeisnow



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gabriel is awesome, Hurt and comfort, John is a dick, M/M, Violence, all the kisses, from enemies to lovers, kind of fluff-ish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-17
Updated: 2014-11-17
Packaged: 2018-02-25 19:47:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2634008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thetimeisnow/pseuds/thetimeisnow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Im Dean Winchester." Of course, a Winchester. It was stupid of Castiel not to think of that immediately, "just in case you wanted to know my name when youre begging for me to save you."<br/>-<br/>or the one when dean falls for the guy he should be hating</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll be your match, your light, your burning sun

 

**I'll be your light, your match, your burning sun.**

**A Destiel one shot.**

The lights flickered on. It was just like the movies, the low rustling sound of old lamp finding their power again. What time of the day it was, Castiel couldnt tell. The room was without any windows or anything that could help him contact the outer world. Castiel had no idea for how long he had been in there, but he was certain it was over two days, without any food or water, with his hands tied behind the chair with a rope made of something he'd never faced before. Castiel was raised a warrior, he knew how to get out of this situation, he knew how to fight and he knew how to stand pain and these conditions he was in. The problem was that the people kidnapping him seemed to know how to hold someone still and tied up. The hours went on, he was sitting there in silence, didn't say a word, didn't let out even a whimper. This was Castiel Novak and you didn't make him do something he didnt want to.

He knew the kidnappers wanted him to suffer, wanted him to scream for them, scream for help and food and water and _anything_. But Castiel wasn't gonna do that. Not now, not ever. If he was going to do die here, he was going to die without letting any information out, without a word.

Just as the light flickered on, a low strangled sound, sounding like a cat being choked, was heard, and Castiel understood that was the door opening. A string of light searched in, but he never tilted his head up, he just continued staring at his tied feet. The light was too much for his eyes, and he wanted to turn his head around or close them fully, but he did neither of it. He just sat there, didn't move a muscle.

He could see the black Dr Martens the guy was wearing, and the jeans in a sharp blue color. His footsteps echoed in the small room when he walked in with fast steps, only stopping when he was around one meter from Castiel.

"Look at me."

The voice was low and demanding, his word almost making Castiel look up to see how he looked like, but he didn't. Of course he didn't. A sharp laughter flied through the room.

"Okay, we'll make it like this. Speak out."

Smack. Castiel's cheek was burning, and he stood against the need to pull a face in pain. He gritted his teeth, still not turning his gaze up.

Suddenly the voice was just underneath his ear. "Listen to me, Castiel Novak, you will speak when im done with you. You will speak and you will never shut up, you will beg for the order to speak, you will ask after me, because you want to talk, you want to scream for me. To _want_ me. Do you understand?"

Castiel wanted to tell the guy that was never gonna happen, but he decided it was wiser to just shut up. He formed his hands into fists behind his back, finally turning his gaze up.

The guy wasn't old, maybe just a year older than Castiel. It was impossible to see what color the jacket he was wearing was, in the low light, but he assumed it was a dark green shape, matching his eyes. It was the greenest eyes Castiel had ever seen, staring down at him with anger filling them. His short, brown hair was hanging down in his face, but Castiel was almost sure it wasn't supposed to, that the guy meant for it to be placed backwards in some kind of a quiff. Maybe it was the heat in here that made it slip back to its natural form.

Castiel wasn't bothered by the heat, even though he was wearing a thick jacket, he was trained with this. He was trained with even hotter temperatures.

"Im Dean Winchester." Of course, a Winchester. It was stupid of Castiel not to think of that immediately, "just in case you wanted to know my name when youre begging for me."

He lifted the bowl of water he had in his hand, up to Castiel's face, and with the other hand he grabbed his hair, pulling his head back. Castiel held back a sound of pain.

"Drink."

Castiel didn't.

"Do you wanna die of thirst? I said drink it."

The water splashed up in his face when Dean pushed the bowl closer to Castiel's lips which were pressed together hard, not willing to let any water in to his mouth. He would rather die.

Dean got it after a while, got that Castiel was not gonna drink it, and he gave in with a shrug.

"Whatever you want, Novak. You will regret this after a while, and you will give up to me, do you hear me?"

Castiel didnt answer, and with that, Dean Winchester left the room, kicking out the water from the bowl and it spread across the room. He closed the door hard when he walked out, and it all went quiet again.

Castiel let out a shaky breath he didnt knew he was holding, and tried to get up as much water he could that had splashed up on his face.

He knew it was just a question about time he got out from here, he knew his family were already searching for him. Threatening one Novak was threatening them all, and Castiel knew the Winchesters was gonna pay for this, they didn't know what they did, and they wasnt gonna know it until it was too late.

The Winchesters and Novak's were sworn enemies, and since Mary Winchester accidentally got killed by one of the fifteen wolves patrolling their area when she stepped inside, it was just a question about time before the two families would declare war.

And this, kidnapping the Novak's youngest son, that meant war. There was no point of telling the Winchesters that they did not really kill Mary, they wouldn't listen anyway.

Castiel was almost certain John didn't even care, he just wanted a reason to call it war, but Dean was devastated, his loving mother, the one he loved more than anything, was dead, and he swore that one day he would get his revenge. Castiel wondered if this was his revenge. If it was, it would mean that he was not gonna have an easy time here.

But he would survive. He was born to survive. With nineteen years on earth and thirteen years of training, he was a warrior, he knew how to survive, and as fast as that one mistake he was trained to see, he would get out of here, he was sure of it.

 

* * *

It took two more days until he couldnt hold it back anymore.  He was aching all over of punches and feet in his ribs, small cuts from a sharp knife. Only two days and Dean only visited five times the first day, trying to get him to drink - or more lick the water from the bowl -, trying to get him to speak or just do anything more than just stare at him. Dean didn't care if Castiel refused, he knew he would break at last, and he was right.

Dean knew the secrets of him, Castiel could see that. Dean knew he didn't wanna die, and therefore he just shook his head and laughed every time Castiel refused to do something.

The sixth time, three days after the day Dean told Castiel who he was, he entered the room, Castiel couldnt hold it back. He tried to ignore the parts of him that was screaming for water, but it didn't work. His throat was so dry he almost couldnt breath. So when Dean shove his head back and bared his throat and water dripped down his neck, Castiel couldnt stop the low sound of pure _need_ that slipped out his lips, and Dean actually looked a bit surprised, as it was the first sound Castiel ever made in his present, but covered it well, laughed and tilted his head.

"You thirsty?" he asked with a smug smirk on his face.

Castiel stared at him, and even if he tried not to, his eyes traveled down to the bowl with water. "I think you are. Go on, Novak, beg for it."

There was the line drawn, though. Castiel wouldn't beg for anything, and Dean seemed to accept only the low, raspy "please" that he managed to get out. Maybe Dean wanted to keep him alive longer.

Dean tilted the bowl, and Castiel parted his lips and let the water stream down his sore, thick throat.

Almost five minutes passed by, the only thing heard was when Dean shifted on his feet and Castiel's small gasps when he tried to get it all down. When the bowl was empty, Castiel turned away his head in shame and Dean laughed roughly.

"Don't look so sad, Novak. I'll be back tomorrow with more water." He smirked and tilted his head, taking a step back, letting go of Castiel's hair. "And oh, i almost forgot..." He threw a bit of bread in his lap, and with that, Dean Winchester left the room.

Castiel had never felt more ashamed than he did that day, but he couldn't help but to feel revealed he got through the visit without a new scratch or bruise, and he did get both water and food.

 

* * *

 

Dean Winchester was leaning back against the back of an old chair, fingering with some cards in his hands. His father was sitting on the other side of the table made of old tree.

"Dean", his father spoke up after a while, looking up from his food.

"Yes, father?"

"Did anything happen down there?"

Down there was where they were having Castiel tied up. A smile spread across his face. "He drank the water."

"And the food?"

"I left it with him, im almost certain he will eat it."

"Im proud of you, son."

Dean felt like blushing. Hearing those words was everything for him. Dean nodded shortly. "Thank you, father."

"Don't let me down now, son. I need all information he has. I dont want a single bit of it out. Do you hear me?"

"Yes, father. I will trade food and water for information, you will get what you want."

"Be careful he doesnt get too strong, you know he's raised like a fighter. He won't give up so easy."

"I got him to say please", Dean said proudly and his father laughed roughly. Dean had to admit he didn't like the sound of that.

"Im proud of you, you will do a great man."

"Thank you, father."

John was still smirking when he turned his attention to the food again. Dean frowned slightly and tilted his head to the left. "When is Sam coming back?"

"I dont know, son."

"Is he okay, though?"

"Dean, stop asking about him."

"He's only fifteen, father, he can't-!"

"Stop it!" John was shouting now, his voice loud and he almost flied up from his chair, his hands, fisting on the table. Spit was flying from his mouth as he narrowed his dark eyes in Dean.

Dean flinched, taking a defensive step back and covering his face with his hands, knowing that something probably would be thrown at him in the nearest seconds. And he was right. A plate was flying across the room, hitting the wall and right back at Dean in million, sharp pieces. He stood against the urge to curl himself to a little ball and hide from his father's anger and hatred.

Not a word more was told, John just left the room, didn't even give his son who was bleeding from several places, another look or asked if he was okay.

Dean Winchesters swallowed the tears and straightened up and took a deep breath. If his father didnt wanna talk about Sammy, then Dean wouldnt ask again. He didn't sleep well that night, his dream was filled with Sam screaming for help, and two blue eyes staring at him. Castiel Novak's eyes. So when he woke up the next day, he didnt even bother look if his father was awake, he just grabbed the bowl of water and paced down to the cellar where Castiel was hold.

Of course Castiel didn't look up when he entered the room, of course he wasn't moving a muscle. It was all normal.

"Some water, Novak?" he asked, but he didn't have the strength to sound either angry or threatening. It was a long time ago his father got that angry, and it was a long time ago Sam left with _I'll be back in a few days_. Dean knew he might be dead, but he wasn't gonna accept that. Never. Not until a body was found.

"You're hurt."

The first real words except the broken _please_ yesterday, Castiel said was those. His voice was low and rough, almost like he was scared it would break if he spoke any louder.

Dean just stared at him in surprise. "Excuse me?"

Blue eye traveled down his body, making him feel very uncomfortable. Dean shifted awkwardly.

"You're hurt", Castiel repeated, tilting his head.

"Not your problem. Do you want water or not?"

"Not."

Dean clinched his teeth to stand against the urge to splash it all in his face. He was their prisoner, he wasn't supposed to look so... relaxed. So Dean punched him in the face. Castiel made a surprised sound, but just stared up at Dean with those accusing, blue eyes he hated.  

When Dean was about to leave the room, Castiel called his name. God damnit, Dean hated his voice. Hated everything with him.

"Don't look so damn surprised, you fucking asked for it!"

"I did not", Castiel answered quietly.

"You want another? I'll gladly give you scars to remember."

Castiel didn't answer, so Dean just kicked the chair. It let out a broken sound, like it was about to fall apart. Castiel just continued stare at him without a word, so Dean left.

 

* * *

 

Three days later Dean got a bit of the information he wanted. He had for those three days sitting in front of Castiel, drinking, eating, living the life, while Castiel was staring at him with big hungry eyes, begging for some food and water.

Three days later without food and water Castiel couldn't hold back anything anymore. If Dean told him to go kill someone, he would probably had done it.

"You look hungry", Dean laughed, tilting his head up. Castiel's eyes fluttered open and he stared at Dean, trying to get out a word. "See, the rules are, you answer my questions and for every answer I get, you get a bit of water and food."

Silence. But then again, Dean wasn't expecting him to speak without getting some water first. His throat was probably thick as hell, so Dean tilted his head up, and the needy noise Castiel made was almost disturbing, so needy it was. The bowl was emptied on a few seconds, and Castiel was gasping in his grip.

"Okay, let's start this easily. Who's your leader?"

Silence. Dean punched him in the face.

"I told you the fucking rules, Novak", he growled, and the younger man closed his eyes slowly and his breath was quivering.

"Gabriel", he breathed out and a smirk spread across Dean's face.

"See, there we go. Good boy. Let's see here on my paper", he said and pulled out a paper from his jeans pocket, looking through the questions his dad wrote down for him. "Ah, here we go.  No, nevermind, we'll take that one later- ah, this is the one. I want names and age of everyone."

Castiel glared at him and Dean rolled his eyes. "Fine, we'll take names. Give all the names of your family -  those who're alive. I want to know who's still alive and who isn't."

"Me", he rasped out, "Gabriel, Lucifer, Anna-" His voice died out and he coughed, but it sounded more like he was dying right at the spot, and honestly, Dean kinda panicked, but just as he was about to give him a little more water, he got himself together again. "-Michael, Balthazar and Raphael."

"Is Anna hot? She sounds hot." Dean asked and laughed loudly, and Castiel just glared at him, waiting quietly for his water. He got it, still gasping for air. Dean understood; without food and water in three days...

"Where do you have you hide-out? I dont need a street name and number, that would just be boring, wouldnt it? Just the location, like in the forest, near the main road... You get the deal, man."

Castiel didnt say anything. A smirk spread across Dean's lips. "I promise you, Castiel, when we get to them, there will be no mentioning that you sold them out."

"Water and food, Cas. I do think youre so desperate you would give them all up, am i right?"

"Near the main road", Cas spit out. That was a lie. They were deep into the forest. It was the first thing he could think of, and yes, he was desperate, but not that desperate. He would rather die than give them all up.

"See? We got you working here. Now let's see... Age, thank you."

"Me, Anna, twenty five. Lucifer, Michael, Gabriel, twenty nine. Raphael thirty five and Balthazar thirty six."

"And still Gabriel is the leader", he sighed, "you weird family."

"At least we're not only two", Castiel spitted and Dean looked up, surprised.

"We're three, and we have a lot of contacts, so dont you dare-"

"No", Castiel cut him off, not taking his gaze away from Dean, "Sam is gone."

Dean stared at him for a few seconds, before almost flying on his, his fists giving out punches like a machine, while Castiel was still getting out words. "He left you, he's not coming back, you're on your own, you're-" and then he passed out.

Dean left.

Later that night his father hit him in the face and threw five plates in his direction, the splitter cutting up his skin.

 

* * *

 

The next day when Dean walked in with a water bowl and food early in the morning, Castiel guessed though Dean looked tired. The bossy attitude he had was there again, but he could hear how he forced it on him. He tried not to think at yesterday.

"Drink."

He pulled Castiel's head back, harder than ever before, and Castiel forced in a whine of pain. The bowl was hardly pressed against his under lip, probably even leaving a bruise.

"Drink for fucks sake!"

Castiel pressed his lips together hard.

"Drink or I'll kill you."

Castiel didn't drink, and Dean didn't kill him.

* * *

 The next day no one came in, but a bit of bread and a little bowl of water was placed on the floor underneath him. Castiel raised his brows, but didnt complain at all. He was starving and his throat was thick and it was hard to breath. The water didn't even feel like water, it just disappeared when he tried to drink it. It was hard with his hands tied behind his back, it took him almost ten minutes and at least four new bruises to get down on his knees and it ended with him licking the water up from the floor as the glass tipped over. The bread was easier to get in. It took him one hour on the floor, and then fifteen more to get the chair up again. Dean knew he could do it, which was why he left it like that.

The heat in the room had been worse the past day, Castiel was sweating and stinking, he needed a shower. He was used to a tough life, but it started to get extreme. He could hear the heat pour out form the valves. The smell of him almost dying in the chair attracted  rats. He couldn't see them in the dark, but he could hear and smell them, and once in a while a rat sneaked up on him, almost scaring him to death when it touched his leg. He knew he could get infected if they tried to eat him or whatever rats did.

Three more days passed by without a word from any of the Winchesters or his own family, but every morning when he woke up bread and water was placed on the floor. The days passed quickly, Castiel gaining more strength, but never enough for him to come up with an escape plan. John and Dean knew how to make him just enough aware of what happened so he could survive.

Castiel didn't know what happened to Dean, why he wasn't visiting. Not that he cared, he was happy the bruises and cuts slowly got better as the time passed, and as he got stronger the heat didn't seem so horrible anymore, he could easily handle it, and he hadn't been forced to answer any more questions. Also the rats understood there was nothing they could get from him here. He was still alive and he wasn't gonna die.

His eyes also got used to the dark, and if he concentrated enough he could see. Just barely, but it was enough. The small string of light from outside the door felt like the sun for him when it was shining through on the right way, filling up the room. Castiel got a good picture of how it looked. It was smaller than he thought, just a meter from the chair to the stone wall behind him, and to the sides surrounding him. A little table made of tree was standing in corner, on it was something that looked like a knife. It was three meters from the chair to the huge port out to freedom.

Not that Castiel ever would reach it. His hands were aching behind his back, his fingers were totally lost and he almost couldnt feel them anymore, same with his feet. His whole body felt horrible and he could ironically thank the Winchesters for giving him at least a chair to sit on, or his body would be destroyed. It scratched everywhere but Castiel couldn't do anything about it.

A whole week later, if Castiel was correct of course, the door was slowly pushed open, and Castiel raised his gaze. Dean looked like he had been through hell. Four times.

His hair was standing in all directions, and his arms were bloody and blood dripped form underneath his ear. Castiel didn't ask though, he didn't want any more hits now when they all were pretty much healed.

"Your family is horrible", Dean laughed, but his voice was just so tired and everything he did was so tired. He didn't even pull back Castiel's head and he didn't shout for him to drink, he just slightly tipped the water into his mouth, and Dean let out a sigh of something sounding like relief when Castiel accepted it and drank. He ate the food too, even thought this would be the perfect day and time to fight back, he didnt do it. Dean looked... broken. And Castiel didn't wanna break him more. Why, he didnt know, he just couldnt.

"Did my family do this to you?" he asked after a while with Dean panting silently from one of the corners next to the door where he had sunk down to the floor, resting his head in his hands.

"Kind of", Dean answered and Castiel tilted his head slightly, frowned a bit.

"How do you mean?"

"None of your concern", Dean let out with a threatening voice.

"Im sure it is my concern, Dean. It's my family and whatever they did im certain it was because of me."

"Hell it was. That little guy who thinks he's hilarious is the fucking devil himself."

"Gabriel", Castiel breathed, but more to himself. "What happened?" he added with a stronger voice and Dean shrugged.

"So that's your idiotic leader? Wow. Anyways, we lead them away from here, and - Gabriel, right? I'll go with the fucking mini devil - grabbed my back and gave me a few punches and shit, but father got him and then we just ran off. I dont know."

"What happened to Gabriel?" Castiel asked sharply.

"I dunno. I was just running away."

"Dean-"

"No, you have no right to know this anyway. Forget what i just said."

 Castiel tilted his head even more, but kept quiet as Dean got up on his feet, walking out from the room, closing the door behind him with a loud bang

He didnt really expect Dean to be back that night, but he did, even if it was only walking past Castiel, grabbing the knife on the table-desk thing - Cas couldnt really turn his head enough to really see what it was - and walked out again. Just that, nothing more. No _hi_ and no _drink_  and no _eat this_. No nothing.

Not that he cared.

 

* * *

 

Dean couldn't sleep that night. His body was aching and his father didn't give a crap. Last night, just before he got in to get the knife, his father told him Castiel was gonna die. They were gonna kill him. Dean was gonna kill him, more exactly, to get his revenge on Mary. So that night everything Dean saw in front of him when he closed his eyes, was Castiel laying on the floor, screaming of pain blood pumping out from his chest, eyes wide open and how he tried to get out something that sounded like Dean's name, but then his eyes rolled back and it all went quiet, and Dean was standing with a bloody knife in his head.

And that was all he could see the next few days he walked in with food and water to Castiel. He didn't even bother scream at him anymore, only tilted the bowl - that after a few days turned to a bottle instead - upwards and if he wanted to drink, he drunk, and if he didn't, Dean just put it down and tried with the food.

Castiel got more and more confused and relieved, and after four days, Dean natural visit was just give him something to drink, something to eat, speak a few words, maybe Castiel asked about the weather or anything, and sometimes nothing at all, and then Dean left. That was all. No angry yelling, no hitting and no cutting.

And one day something else happened. The chair fell over as Castiel reached over to hungrily take another bite of the bread. Or, it never fell over, because Dean was catching him. One hand around the chair and the other one's fingers was around Castiel's wrist. And Castiel's skin was burning on a way he didn't know what it was, it just burned and he and Dean stared at each other until Dean slowly let go, and left the room, leaving Castiel even more confused.

Then the day that changed everything came. It was a normal Sunday, sun was standing low and the day was soon turning into night. Castiel was as always sitting with his hands and feet tied back, it was nothing abnormal about that. Dean on the other hand, he and John was having the loudest argument in years, and Castiel could hear things being thrown, he could hear how they yelled at each other, and somehow, he found himself scared that Dean would be hurt. Which didn't make any sense because he didn't care about Dean at all, of course.

It was two weeks after Dean stopped being a dick against him, and just didn't care anymore. It got Castiel to think more and more as he got back his strength. This night changed it all.

Dean was standing straight up, his hands formed to fists, his eyes practically shifted red as spit was flying from his mouth when he screamed. John was the same but worse. His anger wasn't as controlled as Dean's, at least five plates had been thrown, and one hit Dean right over his chest, glass splattering out over his body, making Dean squirm in pain.

"You can't make me do this!" he screamed, tears forming angrily in his eyes, but he was not gonna let them out, not now, not ever. A Winchester never cried.

"Im sure i can!" John shouted back and punched his fist into the wall behind him, "you'll smite him like a pig!"

"You're a fucking monster." Deans voice suddenly turned low and threatening.

"This is your revenge on Mary!" John took a big step towards his son, but Dean didn't move a muscle.

"No", he said, controlling his anger, "this is your revenge. This isn't even about mother anymore, this is because it's a Novak. It's because you wanna show who's strongest."

"Are you telling me you dont wanna show those fucking idiots who's strongest here?"

"By killing their youngest? If you do that, youre nothing better than them."

Dean knew the punch was coming, but he didn't back away. He took it like the proud man he was. His cheek was red and god fucking damn, it hurt. But Dean wasn't showing any emotion now, he just stared at his father.

"You listen to me now, son", John growled, grabbed the knife, and fear suddenly grew in Dean stomach, but as soon as John grabbed his sons hand, pressing the knife in it, Dean knew what he was gonna do. "You go in there, and you kill him. Or i will kill you saying it was the boy who did it. Do you understand?"

Dean clinched his jaw. "I won't kill him."

"I will make you."

"Go ahead and try."

"Are you giving your life to save his?"

"Yes."

Then another punch and everything went black.

* * *

 

"Dean!"

The screamed seemed to come from so far away. Was it an ocean? What was that sound? An ocean probably. Dean loved the sea, he loved waves. Oh, and he loved the beach. Being there with Sammy, that was the funniest thing he knew. Sam was annoying of course, but Dean loved him over everything eyes and they always had a nice day.

"Dean! Come on, Dean!"

No, that wasn't an ocean. It seemed like.. a school? He was in a school? Why was he in a school? It was years ago he put his last steps there, and he never planned of going back. Even though the teacher was kinda hot, and Dean could without shame admit he thought of her when he was jerking off. No shame with that.

"Answer me, Dean, please."

The voice was more controlled now. And it wasnt a school. It was a little room, very little actually, and it was almost empty except one chair. Was it really a chair? It looked bigger. Wait. It was someone sitting in the chair. Dean lifted his head, confused.

"What are you?"

The person on the chair almost seemed too surprised to answer, only a low huffing slipped though his lips.

"Are you human?"

"Dean, what are you saying?"

"Do i know you? How do you know my name?"

"It's Castiel."

Castiel... He remembered that name. Hey, that was the name of the Novak he was keeping in his cellar!

"Castiel?" he breathed out, suddenly wide awake. He got up from the chair, stumbling towards the door, trying to open it, but it was locked. "What the hell?" he screamed, fingers scratching on the door. Castiel just watched the boy panic, trying his best to find a way out, and he had the same panicked face until his gaze locked on the knife at the desk.

"Cas?" _Cas._

"Dean-"

"What am i doing here?"

"Your father threw you in here. You were out consciousness."

"He- what? He fucking punched me so i _passed out_?"

"I suppose that was what happened, yes."

"Im gonna fucking-"

Castiel sighed and let Dean throw out every curse he had against his father, and not that he showed it, but it was pretty funny to listen to. When his voice died out, his gaze returned to the knife on the desk, like he was trying to figure out what it was.

"Dean", Castiel said, his voice low and hurt, "your father told me a few things before he left you in here."

He would never forget how the door flew open and how he expected food and water and a few words from Dean, but instead, the huge figure of John Winchester was standing there, and in his arms, his son. Dean was twenty, and that showed how strong John really was who could hold him up with just his arms. He put his son down in a chair next to Castiel, and turned to the Novak, spitted in his face, laughed, told him a few things and left.

"What do you mean?"

Castiel coughed awkwardly and tried to shift his hands, not that it worked. "He told me, when you woke up and saw me, you'll get back to yourself, and..."

"The door is locked, damnit!"

"He said when you saw the knife, you would get angry and... i dont know, use it against me, for revenge for Mary Winchester."

Dean stared at him for a long minute, opening his mouth, but closed it again, much like a fish.

"You didn't kill her, did you?"

Castiel shook his head. "She took her own life. She walked in on our area and our wolves took her."

Dean nodded, his eyes suddenly went dark and sad, his shoulders lowered a bit. "Why?"

"Dean-"

"Why?" he repeated.

Castiel tilted his head slightly to the left. "She talked to Gabriel, the devil as you call him", which Castiel found funny though he actually had another brother named after the Devil; Lucifer, "before she stepped in. He held back the wolves, told her that it was stupid and they could to this on another way, she was welcome in to us in peace. Your mother was a kind woman, she was fair and she didn't want this. Gabriel knew that, so he tried his best to make her change her mind, but it didn't work, she smiled at him and told him to... to tell you and Sam you were loved, and then she stepped over and Gabriel couldnt hold the wolves back. Gabriel told me it was because of John she did this."

Dean looked down at his socks, tried to find anything to say, but he couldn't find anything good enough, so he just let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding in.

"Thank you, Cas."

Castiel smiled softly. "You deserved to know."

"Im not gonna hurt you, you know. We'll find a way out from here." Dean made a move that could be releasing Castiel's aching wrists, but even how much Castiel was begging for it, he forced out a short _no._

Dean frowned. "What?"

"Don't. You... you have to get out."

"Are you stupid, Im-"

"Listen, there's no way out of here than that door, and it will not be opened if your father doesnt open it. So do you best against me, use the knife, I'll survive, you know that, and then you go and tell your father youre sorry, and forget about me. Okay? Make your father proud."

"Are you fucking kidding-"

"Dean."

Dean parted his lips helplessly. "Cas..."

"Please."

"Why are you doing this, Cas? Why aren't you screaming at me? Why are you so understanding?"

"Because you're not like your father, Dean. You're a lot like your mother."

Dean let out a small fucking _whimper_ , but Castiel didn't seem to care about it, so Dean decided he would curl to a ashamed ball later. "Cas..."

"Dean", Castiel only answered, not turning his blue eyes away and that was enough. Dean couldn't handle this or him anymore.

He tried to hold back, but it didn't really help. His hand cupped Castiel's face with careful fingers, and green eyes met blue for a moment before Dean fluttered his eyes closed, closing the distance. Dean lips were soft, even softer than they looked like, and Castiel couldn't do anything but to shift his head up to a better angel. The other hand was placed around his neck, tugging  Castiel's hair just lightly, making a soft sigh slip through Castiel's lips.

Dean almost wanted to cry out for how perfect they lips fit together, for how perfect they moved together.

He pulled back way too early, resting his forehead against Castiel's. The younger boy still had his eyes closed when Dean opened his with a cheeky smile on his lips.

"Im sorry", he whispered, grabbing the knife on the table, "I'll be back for you."

Then he took a better grip on the knife, pulling back a few steps. Castiel still had his eyes closed when Dean swallowed the tears, closing his eyes, and swung the knife down.

Two screams was heard. One of pain, coming out from Castiel's parted lips. His head was tilted back and his body was shaking.

Then it was Dean's. Screaming out for how sorry he was, and screaming that _this is for mother_ when he meant _im so sorry im so sorry im so sorry_.

* * *

 

Castiel didn't know for how long he was passed out, but when he woke up, he wished he never had. Everything was aching, the higher part of his shoulder was where the knife hit him. It wasn't as deep as it could have been, he knew Dean didn't want to hurt him. His screams was a little overrated, but he hoped they sounded real, for Dean's sake.

He moved as much as he could in the chair, but regretted it as fast as his shoulder started to ache even more. A low, hurt sound slipped through his lips and he let out a sigh in pain.

The next person entering the room was John Winchester, and it took all in Castiel's power not to scream when his fingers reached up the wound and ran it down it.

"It's pretty deep, isn't it, Novak?"

Castiel only glared at him, didn't say a word. Not that he wanted to, but he was also scared he would let out a sound of pain instead of words if he opened his mouth.

"I'm proud of my son, he'll do a great warrior when im too old for this."

Castiel wanted to spit in his face.

"He'll make the winner of this war."

Castiel really wanted to spit in his face.

"He'll show who's the strongest."

And Castiel spit in his face.

John stared i front of himself for a few seconds, and then his hand flew up and Castiel closed his eyes The chair fell backward with a loud bang and after that he didn't remember anything more.

* * *

 The next time he woke up, someone was sitting next to him, but Castiel's sight was all blurry, he couldnt see a thing. Fear grew in him like a tiger sneaking up at its prey, and he let out a scared scream, and the person backed off immediately, holding his hands up in defense. No one should never forget Castiel was raised a warrior.

His feet flew up and hit the attacker right in the face. They were still tied, and that was lucky for the attacker, who still backed off, letting out a low gruff and covered his face with both hands. Castiel knew he hit him.

"Cas, what the hell!"

He recognized that voice. Castiel gasped in shock, his eyes widening.

"Dean? Dean, im sorry, i didnt-" He put his hands up in a defensive position.

The he realized he could move his hands. His voice died out and he stared at his wrists in front of him like he'd never seen hands before. He slowly moved them around, like he didn't know how they worked. He clenched his fingers, stretched them out again, and did that over and over again, just stared and couldn't believe what he was seeing.

He didn't stop until Dean's fingers wrapped around them, around the red, aching area where the ropes had been tied up tightly.

"It's okay, im gonna get you out of here, just... sit down, im gonna cut the ropes down your feet."

Castiel nodded, speechless, and leaned back, staring at his hands. The weight around his wrist disappeared, and he could hear the sound - even though it sounded like it was thousands miles away - of ropes being cut through, and then suddenly he could move his feet.

He moved them around in small movements. Every move hurt, but he couldnt think of that, nor the wound in his lower shoulder.

"Can you walk?"

"Of course I can-" But when Castiel slowly rose from the chair, his feet didn't hold him up. Dean wrapped one arm around his waist as Castiel tried to make his feet work. He figured this was the price he had to pay for being freed from weeks tied up in a chair.

"Where's John?" he got out quietly.

"I dont know, he said he'd be gone for a few hours, so i figured this was the best time to get you out of here. Im so sorry for the shoulder."

"Dont-"

"I think i managed to get the wound down a bit, or at least take away most of the pain, but you need something better than that, im gonna take you to the outskirt of your area, leave you for someone to take care of you."

"They'll kill you. They won't even hesitated"

"How good i found someone to die for, then."

Castiel actually blushed, and lowered his gaze to stare down at his feet and Dean chuckled adorably.

"Im not gonna let them hurt you, though", Castiel said low, still didn't look up at Dean.

"Whatever", Dean said, tried to shake away what seemed to be turning to a very chick flick moment. "Let's just get out of here, shall we?"

"Yes, Dean."

Dean pushed the door open, and light shone down at them. Cas flinched with a short scream slipping through his lips.

"God damnit- Cas, fuck, it's just light!"

Castiel squinted his eyes. "I haven't seen direct sunlight in weeks", he defended himself. Dean rolled his eyes.

Almost fifty steps - Castiel counted - until they took the last step up from the stone staircase, up in a nice, cozy room. There wasn't anything special about it, just a room with an open, sparkling fire and a dark brown couch, probably made of real skin. Dean looked around, his gaze a bit nervous.

"Okay, Cas. This is gonna be fine, I'll take you to the line and say you got away and I... killed you, threw your body down the sea because i was angry?"

"Sounds... a bit made up but it's probably gonna work."

"It better work", Dean muttered, more to himself, and pushed the glass door out open. Castiel took a deep breath as the wind brushed against his face. It was the first time in weeks he got to breath in free, fresh air. He took a deep breath, just breathed it in with a happy sigh slipping though his lips. It was hard to believe Dean Winchester, the one hurting him bad in the beginning, was the one helping him escape.

He was free.

"Good job, boy."

Castiel froze, and he could feel how Dean did the same next to him, still the arm around his waist. The low, rough voice was easy to place so Castiel didn't even turn around.

"Father, I-"

"Just as we planned, good boy."

Castiel was just about to flinch at the words, but a wave of shock flew through Dean's eyes and he widened them. "What? No-" He turned to Castiel. "No, I swear, it wasnt- i never-"

Castiel believed him. Dean was a horrible liar and Castiel knew that, so he decided to turn around to stare at John instead.

"Don't look at me with those fucking eyes, Novak", he said and pulled a gun out of his pocket, his lips quirking upwards in a smirk. "Step away, Dean."

Castiel could feel how Dean's grip around him tightened. "Let go, Dean."

"What? Are you fucking-"

"Dean."

Slowly, the grip loosened, and Dean just stared at him, his eyes almost hurt. Cas swallowed, turning his gaze to John.

"Shoot me", Castiel said then.

And so John did.

But the aim never reached him, because Dean's eyes flashed from his father to his friend, and he decided directly who was worth it, so he threw himself in front of Castiel, the bullet hitting him right in his chest, and he fell to the ground without a word.

John stared. Castiel stared.

"Dean-" The voice cracked and Castiel's knees felt week, like he didn't have the strength to stand up. But then the anger took over.

"I didnt mean-" John stared, like he was trying to defend himself from Castiel who was slowly turning around against him. It was a stupid move of John to attack, because he knew Castiel might not be stronger, but he was quicker and he was raised to fight and survive. When the first hit came, Castiel easily took a step back, lifting all the weight over on his left foot, while kicking John hard in the side with the other. He quickly got back in balance, taking a few jumps out of his reach, standing just in front of Dean, who was lying on the ground without moving a muscle, and his eyes were closed. John swooped forward, again, and this time he tried a hit from the side, but Castiel's palm was suddenly in the way, breaking the line for the fist. He did exactly as he was learned.

Break the centerline. Control the wrist. Bend it back.

John screamed in pain as the break of his bones was heard, and the seconds was all Castiel needed for giving him an old, straight left right into his face, and the old man fell down on the ground, fucking _whimpering._ Pathetic.

Castiel ignored his shoulder, ignored his feet and his wrists, and just carried Dean up in his arms, and ran.

 

* * *

 

**Prologue**

"Dean! Don't be an idiot."

Dean smirked back at Cas, looking over at Gabriel who was laughing loudly at them, as Castiel glared angrily at the older man holding his gun in his hand.

"Uh-uh, Cas, you're too young to shoot."

"I'm going to punch your stupid face in."

Gabriel pulled a face, "oh, Cas, don't be so dramatic, Dean only wants what's best for you."

Cas let out a loud sigh,, lifting his hands up like he was giving up, and Dean seemed to relax a little, which was exactly what Cas was waiting for. He could see Gabriel shake his head in the corner of his eyes as he attacked his boyfriend with the head first. They both fell to the ground, the gun fell out of Dean's hands, but Castiel didn't really care, it wasn't like he was actually mad, no, not at all. He knew they were just screwing with him. They ended up with Dean pressed to the ground, Castiel sitting over him, and his hands locked over his head by Castiel's own hands.

"Giving up now?"

"Shut up", Dean laughed and got one of his hands loose, pulling Cas down for a quick kiss.

"Take your business inside!" Sam Winchester shouted as he walked passed them with a shrugging Balthazar at his side.

"We'll do fine out here", Dean shouted back, but he was grinning like an idiot.

Castiel smiled down at the beautiful man beneath him. When he brought him back to their camp they all had been suspicious at first, but when Castiel told them what happened, they agreed to help him to hear his side of the story, mostly because of the way Castiel didn't stop crying, didn't let anyone near Dean if their intentions were'nt friendly.

It was a bit hard convincing them it was for the best, that Dean wasn't his father, but now, three years later, he was just as much family as any other member.

One year ago, they got a great surprise when Sam Winchester suddenly walked in, and that was the first and only time Castiel had seen Dean cry. It was heartwrenching, but Sam was welcome to stay, which he also did.

They hadn't heard from John anymore since he shot Dean when they tried to flee, but they all knew he was out there somewhere, planning some shit against them, but Castiel didn't care, not right now, not when he had the man he loved at his side, and his family there to support them to any cost.

"Why are you smiling like some kind of idiot?" Dean asked, gently pushed at Castiel's chest to get him to jump off. 

"Thinking", Castiel shrugged slightly, "you wanna go inside?"

Dean smirked. "You had something special in mind?"

"Maybe my bed would be nice?"

Dean laughed loudly, giving him another kiss, but made sure to linger long enough to still feel the sparkles of his lips when they parted.

"Sound's like a wonderful idea to me", he agreed, and reached down to grab his hand.

Castiel smiled. He was happy.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> name taken by love runs out - onerepublic  
> okay i just had this on my mind and just got it out there ya  
> my tumblr is @catelodid if you wanna leave some promts or anything, i'll take them all!  
> <3


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